Fighting like a girl...

Welp. Today was gonna be Wallow Wednesday for me. I have recently lost my job,and  applied for unemployment, counting on it to bridge the gap until I can find a new job. Then I found out how much I'll actually be getting every two weeks. Full-on panic has set in.

Don't get me wrong. I am thankful for the little bit I am getting. I know every little bit helps. But it doesn't take care of everything, and that, quite frankly, scares the crap out of me. So in the midst of this turmoil and craptastic (word of the day) state I find myself in, I had decided to have a wallow day. I've been teary-eyed and just miserable ever since I got up this morning. It's the first day I've allowed myself to do so. I have been reading Job, and relating, big-time. I've been putting on a brave face and holding up my chin, since people keep telling me to keep my chin up. But as of today, the charade (I'm pronouncing it sha-rod) is over. I am not a happy camper.

I think God knew I needed a dose of reality. I got on Facebook to, of course, share my misery. It was there I got my dose. A couple of my dear friends have been going through a rough time in recent months with their daughter, who has had breast cancer. She's been awesome. Her name is Angela, and she's so brave, and has such unwavering faith. Angela is a sweetheart and I love her like my own, as well as her sister. And their parents, well, there are few finer folks in this world. I served with her dad, who's a pastor, at the same church for several years.

Angela has gone through all the treatments, and things were looking great. Then she found another lump. And now the doctor says that the cancer is back and it could be stage four. Needless to say, the entire family is devastated. There was light at the end of the tunnel, and now it's flickering. But this is a family of faith...a family who has stood together and stared cancer down and said, "You won't win." They're still saying it...just, I think, with heavier hearts this time around.

When I saw that Angela's cancer was back, I just burst into tears. It seems so unfair that someone so young should have to deal with something like this once, let alone twice. She's such an awesome young woman, and  doesn't deserve this. Not that anyone does. I will be praying all the time for this precious family, especially Angela.

There. That's my dose of reality. I may not have a job or much money in the bank, but I don't have a life-threatening disease. I am not battling for my life. I have so much to be thankful for. And I am thankful. So very thankful.

I am thankful that I have so many wonderful friends, as well as family, who are praying for me. All those people that keep telling me to keep my chin up, well, they are saying we're in this with you....we've got your back. It feels good to know that I am not in this alone.

But I feel I should warn you. I am not like Angela. I am not as brave as she is, and there may be days when I wallow and cry. But on those days, I will endeavor to dry my tears, get on my knees and thank God for all He has given me...and pray for Angela. She's fighting cancer like a girl...and I've got her back.